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My Second Ramadan: A Convert’s Perspective
By Jack McGee, Wednesday, 8th August 2012 6:38pm
This year is my second Ramadan, and I felt more comfortable in the days leading up to its arrival than I did last year. I was so stressed about my first Ramadan that I just made myself sick and could not fast for two weeks. This year I have been more peaceful; I did a lot of research to know how to feel good during this blessed period, and that has helped me a lot. I also talk about it more with my friends and colleagues, which I’m pretty proud of.
I still feel alone because I’m the only one fasting at home and I am alone for iftar, so it’s not easy. I have to cook for myself and don’t really feel excited about coming home after work, because I don’t have the chance to enjoy those special iftar moments with my loved ones.
I converted in February last year, and Ramadan was upon us a few months later. I was a bit lost at the time and didn’t know what to do or how to do it, what was allowed or forbidden, so that didn’t make things easy. Alhamdulillah, I just tried to do my best. The hardest thing for me was not being able to share it with my family. I had so many questions that remained unanswered, and honestly, the Internet and books are not as warm as asking questions to a brother or a sister.
I think I’m so proud of having converted to Islam that I want to tell everyone about it. Do you know the feeling when you’re so happy that you just want to scream out loud? When I tell fellow Muslims they are just positively surprised, although other people do create a little distance from me once they know I am Muslim. But I’ve made some great friends since I converted to Islam and I feel really blessed by that!
I am living in a small town in Belgium without any Muslim community or mosque, but when I go to work in Brussels, I notice that Muslims there are not particularly expressive in terms of kindness. My worst Ramadan moment was saying ‘assalamu’alaikum’ to a sister, and she just gave me a dirty look and walked on by. I know that I don’t totally ‘look’ like a Muslim, but I’m disappointed with those sorts of reactions.
have learnt so much since converting. I have bought a lot of books. I pray and read the Qur’an every day. I do my best to learn as much as I can – it’s like I want to catch up on my ‘non-Muslim’ years! My goal now is to learn Arabic and go to university to study theology courses, insha’allah. After that, I would like to teach courses to children. It would be such an accomplishment for me to teach Islam to others.
The hardest part about fasting for me is my morning coffee – I just can’t start without it! And yes, it is difficult to get up early to eat. I generally need a lot of sleep, and most of the time I just cannot get back to sleep after sahur, so I stay awake. It can be hard to concentrate at the office.
I found a good programme online a few months ago called ‘How to Fast in a Healthy Way’, and it really works for me. I try not to eat fatty or fried foods, but more cereals, vegetables and fruits, and drink a lot of water. I’m sharing this programme on my blog because I think it’s really useful. I’ve started to plan my fasting better and organise my days differently. For example, when I come home after work I cook some food and then I try to have a little sleep before iftar. I have also rearranged my schedule at work: I start earlier so that I can also go home earlier, which gives me enough time to buy food and cook. And at lunchtime I go to another room to pray.
This Ramadan I am trying to be more patient. I can get really nervous and stressed about everything, so I am trying to remember to calm down. I have noticed that I’m more peaceful, and that in itself relaxes me so much.
http://www.aquila-style.com/focus-points/my-second-ramadhan-a-converts-perspective/17727/
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